Friday, July 8, 2005

Robert Burke is an idiot

...and he probably pops his collar.

So I found a list of The 13 Most Overrated Songs, and while some of them I have no comment on others I have to point out just how wrong this moron Robert Burke is; and trust me, he's an idiot. At least he didn't put any Bob Dylan on the list because if he had I would have tracked him down and harmed him.

Since tomorrow I have to:

  1. Work in the morning (horray for overtime)
  2. Have a HOTT date for the Hank Williams Jr. concert
  3. A party to go to after said concert with said HOTT date...The Real Don Steel and I are going to have the times of our lives
  4. Drink copious amounts of beer/whiskey at #2 and #3 (not my preference but when you're doing it country style that's how you have to roll)

I'm staying in tonight to rest up and when I found this list I decided I had to comment on it. Which means you guys are getting 2 Friday night posts out of me (lame for me, fun? for you).

I would also like to point out that I listened to each one of these songs as I commented on them and as a result this took an inordinately long amount of time. Note:I thought it was self explanatory if you clicked on the link that Robert Burke didn't choose all the songs (He only chose "Hey Ya" I'm simply calling him an idiot because 1-this name is at the top of the entry since, go figure he posted it; 2-it's easier then calling 13 people idiots; and 3-he is an idiot for choosing "Hey Ya"

1. “American Pie” - Don McLean

Obviously the guy who wrote this is a heartless prick. It's written about the death of Buddy Holly, Richie Valens and the Big Bopper. You'd have to be a total asshole to think this song is overrated. He's also probably some jerk who drinks water in bars and doesn't enjoy drunken sing-a-longs. If you've ever sat around a camp fire, drinking beer, at 2 a.m. singing this song while a friend plays the guitar you know it's not overrated.

2. “Light My Fire” - The Doors

While I will admit this is not my favorite Doors song (I'd listen to Roadhouse Blues, Love Her Madly or LA Woman over it most days) it's meaning is The Doors at their best. I'd go so far to say that it's rock music at it's best. Jim Morrison defiantly singing "Girl we couldn't get much higher" on the Ed Sullivan Show, and when he was told they'd never do the Ed Sullivan show he told them "we just did"...It's sex, drugs, rock and roll at it's prime and for that reason alone it's not overrated.

3. “Free Bird” - Lynyrd Skynyrd

We've already established this tool is a heartless prick, another tribute-this one to the deceased Duane Allman. Yet another song you need to sit around a camp fire and sing drunkenly. Fuck, I don't even camp (not being able to shower is a deal breaker for me) and I enjoy singing this song outside around a fire. Plus, like American Pie any song you can play on a Jukebox and get basically 9 minutes of entertainment out of is kick ass and not overrated.

4. “Hey Ya!” – Outkast

If you've ever seen Christyna, Joel and I dance around to this at a party/in my car/or basically anywhere else since we do it whenever it comes on you'd know how wrong this idiot is. If people "shaking it like a polaroid picture" is overrated and wrong then I just don't want to be right.

5. “Pour Some Sugar On Me” - Def Leppard

Any song that is played with the frequency in strip clubs that this one is-or that is as fun to strip to as this song is clearly cannot be overrated. Come on people, this song is about "The Money-Shot", what can be overrated about that? (Sidenote: There are times when I think I have the sense of humor of a man). It's the 1980's hair band version of sex, drugs, and rock and roll...Plus of all the 1980's hair bands Def Leppard kicks the most ass BY FAR! If Cherry Pie by Poison had been chosen I probably wouldn't have debated it, but Def Leppard and the fact that their drummer continued to play with the band after loosing an arm are bad ass.

6. “Wonderwall” – Oasis

This song reminds me of sitting in coffee shops in High School singing along with friends/or sitting by camp fires singing (I apparently do a lot of that) so while I will admit that the publicity around Oasis as the "next Beatles" was a little ricockulous (say it with me: "ri-cock-u-lous") I, for personal reasons, do not think this song is overrated.

7. “Memory” - Andrew Lloyd Webber

It is by far the best song from Cats, and I don't really think it's as overrated as some other Andrew Lloyd Webber (it's also not as good as some of it...ie-anything from Phantom of the Opera is better in my opinion). My former friend who was obsessed with Cats was also obsessed with this song and she was annoying in general so I don't have the best memories of this song but if I don't hate it after that I don't think it can be considered overrated.

8. “Bohemian Rhapsody” – Queen

Any song sung by a gay man whose music has become a staple of arena rock around the United States (possibly the world-I don't really know) is kick ass (even if this sone isn't one of those songs)...Plus did you see Wayne's World? The range Freddie Mercury uses is this song is simply un-fucking-believeable and as a result it's fun to sing along to and try to duplicate.

9. “I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For” - U2

No U2 song is overrated as far as I'm concerned. There's nothing like turning this song up after a messy break up or when you're feeling lost in life and just "don't know what kind of law you really want to go into/why you're putting yourself through this torture/where your life is going" (ok so maybe that's when I listen to this song). Plus the idiot who made this list didn't even really give a reason for putting it on here (he did discuss how he wanted to put The Rolling Stones or Pink Floyd in this spot-in either case I would have had to cut him).

10. “Totally Wired” - The Fall

I've never even heard this song (or at least don't recognize it off the top of my head) and I'm too lazy to look it up or download it so I know if I've heard it (which I'm sure I have). So I can't really say if it's overrated-but the way this guy is batting right now I bet it's kicks ass.

11. “Born To Run” - Bruce Springsteen

The Boss is not overrated. Ever. This song embodies the working man's rock that Bruce represents. For my money I don't know if there's a better Bruce song, ok maybe Glory Days or Dancing in the Dark...But it's the breathless lyrics that the idiot who made this list complains about makes the song. It's about RUNNING, hence, he's out of breath. Friggin Idiot.

12. “Chewing Gum” – Annie

I don't think I know what this song is, from the discription from the list it doesn't seem like it's from the musical Annie so I'm at a loss and too lazy to investigate if I've heard it. He does mention it was voted the number #11 song of 2004, and I don't remember much (or any) good music from that year so maybe this one is overrated-but the way this dude is going it's unlikely.

13. “Imagine” – John Lennon

As a confessed idealist with leftwing tendencies this song plays to my eutopian version of the world. I love it for that and for how it has come to represent what John Lennon stood for-apparently the heartless ass who wrote this list thought that was one of the reasons it is overrated but for me it's John Lennon's message in one song without the cheesy-ness of All You Need Is Love. Come on, how can you say these lyrics are overrated?

  • Imagine there's no heaven, It's easy if you try, No hell below us, Above us only sky, Imagine all the people living for today...
  • Imagine there's no countries, It isnt hard to do, Nothing to kill or die for, No religion too, Imagine all the people living life in peace...
  • Imagine no possesions, I wonder if you can, No need for greed or hunger, A brotherhood of man, Imagine all the people sharing all the world...
  • You may say Im a dreamer, but Im not the only one, I hope some day you'll join us, And the world will live as one.

Given the state of the world today I KNOW if more people embraced these lyrics the world would be a better place.