"I got news for you. I'm down, I've got the 411."

The other morning I was listening to the radio and they played something I'd heard about before. It's call The Mosquito, think of it as an electric fence to keep teenagers out of stores. It plays a high pitched sound which drives adolescents nuts (most people under 20 can hear it), but can't be heard by people over 30. On the radio show they explained that to be able to hear these high pitched noises the hairs in the inner ear need to be standing up so they can pick up the vibrations, but as you age the hairs get brittle and break off or fall over so you don't hear things as high pitched anymore.

The entire time they played it on the radio I just heard static. Impossible I thought. "You're only 22 ^1/2 and 30 year olds are calling in saying it's piercing and that they cannot stand it." So I decided to do the only logical thing and call the radio station and ask them to play it for me over the phone since I'm 22 and I was hearing nothing, I just assumed they weren't broadcasting it over the air. The guy kinda laughed and said, we've been broadcasting it all morning. "What! Impossible! All I hear it static! I'm not old!" [Radio Station guy hangs up phone on me].

Seriously, you have no idea how upset I am that I can't hear this thing. I've decided it's not that I'm old; it's that I've been to so many concerts, listened to my family scream a bunch, listen to my music so loud, and have been in too many bars and as a result I've suffered hearing loss. Yeah. That's it. Since clearly it could not be that I'm old.