Sunday, August 27, 2006

"Let's Dance, This Last Dance Tonight."

As I sit here, about to start my last first day of school ever I couldn't help but think back about the first days of my past.

Kindergarten my mom walked me right up the door of the classroom. Holding back her tears so as to avoid alarming my sense of fear regarding this place where she was leaving me for the entire day. The mother of the boy who lived across the street wasn't so keen. She sobbed. He refused to enter. There was a huge scene. I doubt it happened on that day but I know on one of the first days of school he got a spanking from the teacher since he refused to stop crying. I can't believe spanking was allowed in classrooms back then.

Middle School I can honestly say I don't remember. I think this gets back to my general blockading of those years from my consciousness. High School most of my classes were "advanced." Of course my first "block" was an upper level class. I remember the cute boy with the spikey hair who sat in front of me, and who was popular and for some reason nice to me. Other than that, it's a blur again.

Then there was my first day of college. 250 person lecture hall. Professor with a bad combover who held the mini-microphone rather than clipping it to his lapel. I remember being afraid to sit near people, afraid to make eye contact.

Then there was law school. It was like the same feelings as college all over. Only I was at least a year younger then everyone there, and I felt like it was written on my forehead. I remember it being so nerve racking; the seating charts, the socratic method, the frenzied typing as I sat and pondered how important anything said on the first day could be. Mostly I just remember how tired mentally and physically I was at the end of the day.

This year is bound to be a year of lasts; last first day of school, last blue book exam, last vacation for 5 years. I just hope I'm not too busy to enjoy them.


lalagigi said...

what do u mean no vacation for 5 years?

aka bidethamsterette and fuzzgirl46

Elle Woods said...

I wish, not happening at my firm for the first few years.