Saturday, June 25, 2005

''Matt, Matt, you don't even -- you're glib"

Ok, so I wasn't going to blog about TomKat and how CRAZY Tom Cruise has gotten. Even after I watched the now infamous Matt Lauer interview I decided I wouldn't blog about it. But, it's hot as fuck out and I came inside and I watched it again. Something that was kinda bothering me the first time I watched it became even more clear the 2nd time. I now know what it's like to live with Tom Cruise, because I think Tom Cruise may in fact be the same person as my father...Now, I'm sure some of you are saying, "but your dad isn't as attractive at Tom Cruise!" Yeah, I know, but I swear they're the same person.

I've compiled a list of reasons why they're the same person:

  1. Both have dark hair
  2. Both are very short (under 5'7'')
  3. Both are in their 40's
  4. Both are insane
  5. Both advocate vitamins rather then Rx drugs-particularly for psychiatry
  6. Both think they know more then everyone else-no matter how educated that person is
  7. While they both preach how they know more then others, neither really know anything...My dad I'm convinced just makes shit up or changes around what he hears to make it what he wants and while Tom Cruise claims he's researched the history os psychiatry, yet he's so dyslexic he used to have scripts sent to him on tape. (Too be fair, he now claims Scientology cured him of his dyslexia-so he might have done some research, and I suppose he could just pay people to do it for him).
  8. Both are extremely anti-ridalin (which means you can tell they never went to college and had to write research papers overnight)
  9. Both are rumored to be gay
  10. and the kicker...both are named Tom

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