Heaven

Alternate Title: I Hate Ohio Week Continues

Yes, I do realize it's kind of moronic to post this story after declaring that there is no god this morning. We're talking rivalries here people, plus 98% of men would say women make no sense anyway-so let's just go with it.

A highly recruited high school football player...was visiting schools to try and find the best college to attend. His first stop was at Florida State.

When he got there, Bobby Bowden immediately picked up a golden telephone. After talking several minutes, he said, "Thank you, God" and hung up. This shocked the young man. He asked the coach what was so special about the golden phone.

"Well, this phone is a direct line to God. And God tells us whether or not new recruits would be stars at our university. And we think you could be one of our stars!" The athlete asked if he could use the phone to ask God what college he should pick. "Sure, you can! But it's going to cost you $1,250. Calling Heaven isn't cheap." The fellow didn't have that kind of money, so he moved along. Who would want to live in Florida anyway?

His next stop was Ohio State. Upon entering Jim Tressel's office, Coach Tressel immediately picked up a golden telephone. After talking several minutes, he said, "Thank you, God. We'll let him know." and hung up. The boy said, "Hey, I've seen that phone before. Can I use yours to call God and ask what college I should pick?" Tressel said, "Sure, but it's going to cost you $150. Calling Heaven isn't cheap." Again, not having that kind of money, the lad left. He didn't want to live in Ohio either.

His last stop was in Ann Arbor, Michigan. Upon arrival at the office, Coach Carr picked up a golden telephone, talked to God. After a few minutes he said, "Thanks," and hung up. The boy just had to use that phone, so he said, "Coach, I really need to use that golden telephone so I can call God and ask him which college I should choose. From Florida it was going to cost me $1,250. From Ohio they wanted $150. So how much will it cost me to call Heaven from here at Michigan?"

Coach Carr smiled and said, "Nothing, son. It's a local call."