Longtime readers are aware that my holiday functions tend to be a tad bit interesting, to say the least. This Thanksgiving was no exception.
I should have known it was going to be interesting early on. I was setting the table and I walked out into the "room off the kitchen" (for lack of a better term) where the garbage is kept. Most years we have shrimp cocktail as an appetizer before dinner. The room reeked of what I assumed to be shrimp so I made a comment to my grandma about saying I thought we weren't having shrimp cocktail this year. Her response, (mind you my grandma is 5' tall, weighs under 110 lbs and is generally class..."We're not, that garbage just smells like rotten pussy." Yeah.
Uncle Krackhead showed up with his Krackhead girlfriend. Who proceeded to:
- Take 15 minutes to "move her car"
- Pass out on the couch sitting up multiple times
- Regale us with stories about how she shops at Salvation Army
- Disappear after dinner every 15 minutes (with my uncle)
Classic.
Next my mom, dad and I went to visit a couple friends and their family. First a friend of mine (which was fun but uneventful so we'll skip it). Then a friend of my brothers, which is where things got interesting. I met shoe designers (who were twin brothers) who were hot enough to get me to eat Chitlins (which I do not recommend, however if you're forced to eat them, Frank's Red Hot is a must).
There's more, but I have a 30 page paper due Wednesday which I've barely started so it'll have to wait.